Dec 062011

My. Husband. Cut. My. Baby’s. Hair. And now my baby is gone.

In case that didn’t get the point across, I’ve seriously had a hard time with Jaron getting his first haircut.

Jake did it with my grudging permission, so it’s not like he snuck off and chopped off those baby strands, but I wasn’t ready. I knew that he was going to need one soon and figured it would be in the next couple of weeks since his hair was starting to get close to being in his eyes. Jake’s been mentioning cutting it for months now. So I finally caved and let him cut it.

We just did it here at home because Aedyn’s first haircut came out horrible even though he sat perfectly still and let the stylist do what she needed to do. And it was at a kid’s place, the only one in town. I wasn’t doing that again and Jake knows his way around a head of hair, so we just went that route.

Bad idea.

Not because Jake didn’t do a decent job (although cutting hair on a Mexican jumping bean might have been easier than cutting Jaron’s). But because he did the job in the first place.

*Rabbit trail: A book that I read before we were married described men’s and women’s brains as visual and emotional respectively. As an example, the book said to think of a rolodex, at any point in time that rolodex can flip open to any moment in the past and the person has no control over that happening. For men that can be pretty much anything they’ve ever seen that made an impression, for women it’s emotions. Any trigger can set off emotions from that past that are as potent as the time they were originally experiences.*

I was upset all day long. Mad, fuming, hurt, upset. I came up with a dozen different reasons for my reaction. The slight unevenness above Jaron’s ears to dishes being in the sink to Jake not saying thank you for something the week before (I didn’t say they were good reasons…).

I finally realized what was really going on. I wasn’t ready to cut his hair. I felt like I was being bullied into doing something to my child that was unnecessary and that what I wanted for him wasn’t even being considered. I was reliving my c-section. Don’t ask me why cutting Jaron’s hair was a trigger, but it was.

And I felt like I was losing my baby. I still feel that way. Every time I look at him. He looks like a little boy now. It feels different when I look down at him while he nurses. I’m struck by how old he looks and yet how tiny he is while he plays with his brother. He looks completely different.

I know that he can’t stay a baby forever and I’ll never be 100% ready to let him grow up. But I wish I’d held out for another week. Until he really and truly did have hair in his eyes and the need for a haircut was undeniable on every level.

I miss my baby. I wonder if it really was different with Aedyn or if I took out my emotions on the unknowing stylist as I blamed her for ruining his hair. Maybe with the next one, we’ll risk the stylist…just so I’m not unexplainably angry at my husband for the following 24 hours.

Have you ever had such an emotional reactions to something that seemed simple and routine? How did you handle it?

Share your thoughts and come join me on Facebook, and Twitter!

Nov 142011

So I’ve been a bit out of pocket this week.

It’s no secret that we’ve been planning on moving for awhile, we were pretty excited about it. But every time we tried to nail details down, something just wouldn’t solidify.

We applied for the apartment, but the office wasn’t sure for awhile when it would be ready, so we waited.  And waited.

Then we got the go ahead, and the appointment to sign the lease changed twice. Then we found out that Jake wasn’t going to have a day off this week.

Throw some more life in there and things just became chaos.

So this past week I haven’t been on Facebook (personal or Blog page) or Twitter and I haven’t blogged at all.

I feel horrible about the abrupt stop, but this is the first chance I’ve really had to catch a breath.

I skipped church and there’s a van full of stuff waiting to be unloaded. I’m not worried, God knows I needed rest and the van’ll wait till tomorrow.

So that’s a bit to catch up. I’ll try and post some more this week, maybe not every day, but I’ll at least catch up with my BF Blog Hop!

Wish me luck getting everything organized!!!!!!

Oct 022011

Oreos. Mint Oreos. Yum.

Now that I have that out of way.

I’m not at liberty to get into the gritty details. But this week has been an interesting one, and it doesn’t even compare to the yesterday and today.

Our family had something awesome happen a few weeks ago. Then it surged into phenomenal. Or so we thought until yesterday. Now we’re back to “merely” awesome. It’s a hard place to be. We know that things are so much better than they were a few months ago; more than we even have a right to ask for! But not as big as what we allowed ourselves to get our hopes up and had come to expect. So Jake and I are dealing with the maelstrom that is disappointment, excitement, depression, and elation.

It doesn’t make any sense. But we’re grateful to be where we are and looking forward to where we’re going!

This was my 5 minute Stream of Consciousness Sunday post. It’s five minutes of your time and a brain dump. Want to try it? Here are the rules…
  • Set a timer and write for 5 minutes only.
  • Write an intro to the post if you want but don’t edit the post. No proofreading or spellchecking. This is writing in the raw.
  • Publish it somewhere. Anywhere. The back door to your blog if you want. But make it accessible.
  • Add the Stream of Consciousness Sunday badge to your post.
  • Link up your post here.
  • Visit your fellow bloggers and show some love.
Sep 262011
At it’s best…

I’m so tired of toys. My boys definitely don’t have as many as they could have, but there’s enough. They’re all stored around the edges of the living room. Even when they’re picked up and put away, it still feels cluttered.

Here’s my dilemma. I want the boys to play out here, I want our family room to be a FAMILY room. But I don’t want the mess.

Our house right now is pretty small and the way things are arranged, it’s not possible for us to store the toys in their room. We’re moving in about a month or so and that will change. It’s my chance to change things.

I asked what other moms of toddlers did through Facebook and Twitter (go like and follow, I’ll wait…). The response was very mixed, but even the mms who had the toys stored in the bedroom usually had a basket or hidey hole in the living room.

Then I asked about whether or not bedroom play was supervised. The answers were mixed again but @YourVALisa suggested using a monitor. Genius! We’ve never had or used a monitor but I’m going to start watching Craig’s List for one I think.

At it’s usual…

And I think I will move the toys to their room. There are a lot of changes that I’d like to make when we move and a big one involves how much TV time they have. I think it might be easier if we are mostly in their room with the toys and the TV is out of sight. Or at least to have that option.

So, even though I think I’ve made my decision, what do you do? Anythings that I should think about that might make me change my mind? Share your thoughts and come join me on Google+, Facebook, and/or Twitter!

Sep 152011

Things are changing…. Guess it just felt like it was time to move the furniture around again.

In case you hadn’t noticed, let me direct your attention to the top of the page ^ new header. And to either side < > new sidebars. I’ll be changing some little details here and there, but I think the biggest ones are done. (If I need your button in my sidebar, let me know!)

What do you think? And for anyone who has Blogger experience, is there any way to center my tabs at the top of the page? Downside of the photos in the header, I can’t find a font color that’s visible over everything. I’m not really thrilled with the idea of moving them to the sidebar, so any help would be appreciated.

The Reason Why
Basically, I wasn’t thrilled with the name Milk Bubbles, I love it for my nursing covers and I think it will do great  if/when we roll out the rest of the products we’re developing (aka playing around trying to find something that we like and that works). It just didn’t feel right for the blog. Who knows, maybe I’ll saddle my breastfeeding posts ith that name as sort of an ongoing series, but for the whole…meh.

I found myself pretty attached to my twitter handle and the more I thought about it, the better it seemed to fit. The most and best of my writing comes when I have 2 sleeping babies. It’s that time when I can talk, unwind and be more than Mommy for just a little while. The time when I can kind of pull things back in balance.

So without further ado, welcome to 2 Sleeping Babies!

P.S. I will be getting my own url in the next couple of weeks and then at the beginning of the year I plan to start self-hosting, opinions on who’s the best to go with for that?

Questions? Comments? Complaints? Let me hear them!

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